the overthinker

hi everyone. this will be a very brief post. i’m moving to a new site, so please go there and follow me because i love all your feedback!

my blog’s new home is at: http://www.iamtheoverthinker.blogspot.com

hope to see you there!

love,

amy

for those of you who know me on facebook, you’ve undoubtedly seen my comments on the nature of peoples’ statuses. let me preface this by saying i realize i am also extremely annoying, most likely to 90% of the people who come into contact with me (whether it be online or in person). which is why i feel i’m justified in calling out others who similarly annoy me. good, glad we got that squared away.

can someone please explain why facebook has become a huge, open invitation to pity parties? we can probably all immediately think of 5 to 10 people who consistently post depressing statuses. and not just once a day; more like 100 times a day. every time i refresh my page, there’s another one that makes me want to curl into a fetal position and suck my thumb. why do these people think we want to know about the utter misery they’re suffering through? and i’m sorry, but heavy traffic on the way to work or mismatched socks are not grounds for antidepressants.

i mean, what do people do? burn a piece of toast and think to themselves, “my life is CRAP! i’m putting this on facebook right now!” is it a lack of other stimuli in their lives? they feel the need to just post about whatever is happening to them and make it into a sullen ordeal? is it for attention? are these people just natural whiners? i can’t figure it out. what irks me the most is that these people think we all want to see it! try posting something positive for a change. how bout, “yay! my toast came out a perfect golden brown this morning!” they can at least try to balance it out a little bit, can’t they?

the worst is when the statuses are cryptic. i’m sorry, did i pick up the da vinci code again? i don’t want to have to think while i’m on facebook. in fact, that website is where i go when i want to engage in endless hours of total brainless activity. i don’t want to come across posts that make me question what exactly the problem is. for example: “oh no! i can’t BELIEVE this happened!”

um. okay. obviously something totally awful has occurred and your life will never be the same. and also obviously, you want your entire social network to know that something totally awful has happened. so how bout you just tell us what it is? instead, 309 people simultaneously comment varying degrees of “what’s the matter?” i refuse to be one of these people, because i prefer clear, concise statuses that give me the who, what, where, when, and how without me asking any questions. however, i will occasionally check back to see if our damsel in distress has responded. half the time, she doesn’t write anything the entire day, at which point people might genuinely start to worry. nine times out of ten, she’ll write something like, “oh never mind…thought i lost my favorite glitter pen!” that one other time, she’ll inform us of something that IS totally awful, at which point rounds of sympathy statements are uttered accompanied by sad and crying faces. but please let us know right away so we don’t have to spend the day in such suspense. (disclaimer: there was no reason for me using a “damsel” here, especially as males are just as dramatic as females when it comes to facebook).

just remember that there are lots of people reading your statuses. so unless you want to be equated with the likes of farmville and the facebook mafia which are happily hidden from most peoples’ news feeds, do us all a favor and try lightening up your statuses a bit.

i may not be the most responsible person in the world. i’ve occasionally littered. guests of mine have made a lot of noise in the backyard when neighbors were trying to sleep. i never go to bed early enough to not be exhausted for work. i’ve even forgotten to brush my teeth…and sometimes, it was deliberate. don’t judge — you’ve done it too. and if you haven’t, then you’ve never passed out drunk.

but there are certain things that absolutely DEMAND responsibility, and those things include our pets. usually we choose to have pets in our lives. it takes a conscious effort. they don’t just arrive on the doorstep (well, sometimes they do, wrapped in blankets in a basket with a 50-dollar bill on top) but usually, we make the decision. so if we make the decision, then we need to abide by the responsibilities that come with it. otherwise, we shouldn’t even enter into pet ownership in the first place, right? good, glad we agree.

so you can imagine my dismay when, while taking a walk the other day, i saw a gorgeous black lab (or something that looks like a lab, but it was beautiful nonetheless) running rampant with no tag or collar of any sort. he sat when i told him to sit. he laid down when i told him to lay down. this was someone’s well-trained, well-groomed dog. with no sort of identification whatsoever. which led me to believe its owners took the time to teach it tricks but didn’t think it was necessary to keep it safe, the highest priority in pet ownership. okay, maybe the fence is faulty and the dog escaped. maybe it ran out the front door and off into the night. but a tag with contact info would’ve solved this dilemma — it’s almost like saying they don’t care what happens to the animal if they don’t give it a tag.

and on that note, we need to make sure our fences are in good condition so pets can’t escape. they don’t know any better, but we do. i’ve seen dogs trotting around nice neighborhoods on 90º days, panting with something probably close to heat stroke. how can we be so negligent? and again, how can these animals not have tags?! it is truly baffling, and it angers me. and it should anger you too.

the saddest part about this is that it’s not limited to dogs — people even neglect their own children. leaving them to suffocate in the backs of cars because they forgot they were in there. letting them stay home alone while they go drinking at bars only to find them dead next to an empty bottle of aspirin or lysol. why do we allow ourselves to treat others this way? small children and animals who depend on us for survival and guidance. they have nowhere else to turn, and we’re countlessly hearing of stories where we’re letting them down.

so what can we do? we can all pledge to be more responsible for those who aren’t. if you see a stray or lonesome dog, call an animal shelter if you can’t take it home yourself. at least it’ll be provided with food, water, and shelter. a facebook friend of mine recently posted that he noticed a baby in the backseat of a car and most likely saved its life by alerting someone. another friend posted that someone had petsmart announce over the loudspeaker to the entire store when a dog was left in the car during 90-degree weather.

if you know someone whose dog doesn’t have a tag, encourage the owner to get one. if you see a dog wandering the streets, try to help it. and we obviously can’t always count on others to do their part, which is why the rest of us have a job to do. because even if it requires a little extra effort on our parts, for something that might have nothing to do with us, at least we can say we did what we could to help a small child or animal who would’ve otherwise had no one to count on. five minutes of your time can save a life.

anyone who owns a pet knows the unconditional love that comes with ownership. except for the people who beat them and use them in dogfighting rings, of course. but normal people enjoy their cat, dog, fish, or iguana’s company and feel comforted by their presence. we like being greeted by something when we return home after a trip to the food store (upon which a dog will react as if you’ve been lost at sea for several years). granted, a fish won’t jump out of its bowl to give you a welcome lick but i’m sure he’ll do a subtle somersault. fish can’t be too outlandish, after all. they have to keep a low profile.

as us pet owners also know, our lovable little creatures come with plenty of cute tricks up their sleeves (it’s a phrase, i know they don’t have real sleeves, unless it’s paris hilton’s dog who wears gucci sweaters) and along with the cute stuff comes the quirky stuff that oftentimes makes us want to rip our hair out.

case in point.

my dog is five years old. this has given me four solid years and a couple of months to get to know her. i know when she has too much energy and needs to be chased around the house. i know when she’s pretending to be tired so i don’t make her go pee in the rain. i know when she wants a beef jerky instead of a healthy beneful treat (or as my boyfriend calls them, ‘beneficials.’). i know when she’ll be curled up against my pillow if i leave the bed for even a second in the middle of the night. i know where to find her if she’s not in the room with me. and mainly, i know the sounds she makes right before she throws up.

if you’ve ever lived with a dog, you know the telltale signs, and that you have about 20 seconds before the eruption. they make that awful gurgly gaggy sound as their stomach heaves and their neck juts back and forth as the vomit works its way up their esophagus. but before the official sounds begin, there are a couple warning signs; she’ll lick incessantly for about five minutes and swallow heavily. or she’ll sit up from a sound sleep and not lay back down, looking as “green” as a dog possibly can. at this point, i’ll turn my awareness level to “high,” waiting for the signal to grab her and get her to linoleum or concrete. i feel terrible when i grab her and start running like a maniac to get her to an ideal puking spot, but i just bought a new bedroom rug last year and really don’t want that cleanup project if i can avoid it.

but then i think to myself: imagine how you’d feel if you were nauseous and someone grabbed you around the waist to cart you off to a bathroom? it would be horrendous. but people also have a little bit better sense not to just hurl all over someone’s brand new carpet, right? (drunk people excluded; i know they have very few inhibitions). i’m thinking of training my dog to use the toilet when she needs to throw up. wouldn’t that be great? she’d walk calmly out of the room (because of course she wouldn’t want to disturb me) and saunter into the bathroom, where she’d delicately lean her head into the bowl and let her body rebel against her. but who am i kidding? i’m still working on perfecting “sit.”

so why am i writing about this? because i experienced it just last night. my dog is laying on my bed and i’d just turned out the light (so put the time at somewhere far beyond midnight) when the warning sounds began. i flipped on the light and sat up rigidly, awaiting the sign that i’d have to dart and cart. after about 10 minutes of swallowing, belly gurgling, and flip-flopping, i finally gave up and decided that if she threw up, i’d deal with it when it happened. luckily, last night was just indigestion.

but there’s always tonight.

so i always do this to myself, and figured i might as well write about it while it’s actually happening. get to the root of the problem. actually, in this case, i’ll only end up prolonging the problem, so let me get going here. not that you were stopping me before or anything. besides, if i wasn’t blogging right now, you know what i’d be doing? i’d be playing trap on my droid. trap is the single most addicting game ever for a cell phone. well, to me, anyway. even when i can’t get past level 8 after the 394,286th time i’ve played, it’s still just as fun to start over. how many games can you say that about? that’s what i thought! anyway, i figured this would be more productive than playing trap. but the other problem is, after i tell you about my problem and then go get a drink of water, i’m going to end up playing trap anyway. okay, for real this time.

it’s monday night. well, for another six minutes. i actually thought it was later than this, so i’m kinda glad it’s not even midnight yet. anyway, my problem is that i’m a self-induced insomniac. i used to be a real insomniac, and some nights it hits me that i couldn’t fall asleep even if i wanted to, but lately it’s definitely a self-fulfilling prophecy. ya know, i learned that phrase in college and have easily used it once a month ever since. higher education, for the win. sorry, i digress. so i’ve mentioned in earlier posts that i have a tendency to stay up late, wake up for work, hate myself for staying up late, drive to work with my eyes half-closed, and then tell myself i’m going to bed immediately after work. i will not pass GO or collect $200. well, if someone offers me $200, i’d definitely stop, but i’d go to bed RIGHT after that. and then what happens? mom calls to tell me she made filet mignon or something equally mouthwatering, so of course i eat dinner with my parents. then i come home, try to convince myself of 84 reasons why i shouldn’t work out, then i log onto facebook and look at peoples’ pictures and post inappropriate videos on peoples’ walls. and then it’s three minutes to midnight (yeah, i DO type that fast) and i’m complaining about my self-induced insomnia.

i’m sure if i laid down right now, i could fall asleep. i mean, i was totally exhausted earlier — that doesn’t just go away. in fact, it probably rolls over like at&t minutes and adds to my already anticipated tuesday morning tiredness. why do i do it? i don’t know! i like being awake? well, sure, but i LOVE sleeping. why don’t i try to do it more often? it’s a vicious cycle and i don’t have the power to break it. one night i googled “ways to make yourself tired” or something like that and it told me to drink warm milk. so i heated up some milk and almost gagged. i’m sorry, but hot milk is freakin’ disgusting and i will never drink it again. that stuff’s for cats. anyway, then they tell you all these other things like don’t do anything in bed besides sleep (did i mention i’ve been parked on my bed for the past four hours? whoops) and a whole host of other things i inevitably do every night before bed. why do we need to sleep anyway? maybe one day they’ll invent humans that don’t need to sleep. they just charge through solar power or something. hmm…hybrid humans. has anyone thought of this? if you steal my idea, i have proof because it’s written here.

and that’s another thing. i stay awake for no good reason and then end up writing nonsensical posts like this that will inevitably offend and disgust my small (but very important) reader base. why am i not working on an award-winning novel that will encourage thieves to take up less criminal hobbies? why am i not knitting a blanket for someone’s baby? someone is ALWAYS having a baby, but i have no idea how to knit. i could try to drink a warm glass of milk again and spare everyone this rambling, but remember what i said, PLUS i don’t have milk. i NEVER have milk. or eggs. and i always want cereal. and eggs. you’d think i’d remember to pick these items up at the food store, but no.

similar to how i should remember not to stay up this late every night, but here i am anyway.

it’s now 12:03. i’m going to get my glass of water and then playing trap. i apologize for anyone who made it this far, but scarily, i feel a little tired. p.s. it’s now 12:04.

(disclaimer to the title: unless it’s drugs, murder, or related illegal crimes).

is it just me, or is every one of your facebook friends married with 10 kids already?

alright, alright. i know it’s not every single person, but doesn’t it feel like it is? between profile pics of ultrasounds (in which case i assume i missed the official “i’m pregnant!” status announcement), interim pregnancy “look at my growing belly” scrapbooks, and pictures of newborns (who basically all resemble little old men), i feel surrounded by reproductive efforts. and if it’s not a recent birth, it’s a wedding, engagement, baby shower, wedding shower, graduation from yale’s master’s degree program in astrophysics, or something else making me feel equally inferior.

it makes me wonder if i’m lagging behind, but then i talk to “the others” (no, that’s not a Lost reference), who reassure me that we’re not really old maids who are one step away from a life in the convent. not that there’s anything wrong with the convent lifestyle (sidebar: is that where they get the word ‘conventional’? man, i’m teaching myself new things through this blog. and yes, you better believe i did just pat myself on the back). but i guess my bottom line here is that facebook and social sites make some of us question if we’re on the right track. instead of just reminding ourselves that we’re all different (and always have been, it’s just that now we have photographic evidence of everyone’s endeavors), we end up comparing ourselves to our peers in a way that’s so much more important than what we did when we were younger. progress seems to matter so much more now, doesn’t it?

of course this could have a positive influence on our networks and encourage them to engage themselves in life-improving activities (no, i’m not saying everyone should go out and get pregnant tonight. can’t you follow along?) such as picking up new hobbies or finally enrolling in that art class we’ve been thinking about since we graduated college (what was it, three decades ago now? sigh). seeing others pursuing their passions has definitely had an impact on me personally. maybe not the biggest feat in the world, but here i am blogging because of my friends who made it look like a lot of fun, and a great way to share and receive feedback on countless topics that mean a lot to us. to take it a step further, i’ve always loved writing but found i had no outlet for it once i left school. and even then, it was reduced to research papers (don’t miss those!) and scribbled notes while falling asleep in class (oh be quiet, you did the same thing). and yes, i did the occasional stint with the college newspaper and even a freelance gig one summer after i graduated, but it sort of fell to the wayside. i wasn’t inspired. now i am. and i can attribute that inspiration to the network of people who instilled it in me. i’ve also recently begun baking cupcakes, as most of my facebook friends have seen. it’s fun to pick up something new.

so i encourage all of you to look around you not with an air of insecurity and doubt, as we’re often prone to do. if you see someone doing something that makes you envious, do it for yourself! or at least find something that gives you the same feeling of satisfaction. we can’t all be painters, or singers, or athletes, but we can perfect the skills we DO have, so let’s start there.

and no, i did not just attend a tony robbins seminar. speaking of which, doesn’t he always look a little TOO happy? and i know this is gonna sound kind of sadistic, but i think i’d get a little thrill out of seeing him get arrested for something.

can someone please tell me what’s wrong with islam? and i’d like to explain my question: why do people have such a PROBLEM with islam religion? oh wait – it’s because their followers have been accused of terrorism and murder, right? correct me if i’m wrong, but haven’t plenty of other religions had members who committed acts of terror or murder? yet we don’t stereotype everyone from THOSE religions to be bad apples. why do we do it with islamic religion? i was reading about the mosque the NY committee has given permission for, two blocks from ground zero. and people are freaking out, saying it’s a slap in the face after 9/11 and so forth. i’m sorry, but what proof does anyone have that islamic terrorists crashed the planes into those towers? i know that’s what we were told, but i’m of the state of mind that we shouldn’t accept everything we hear. especially in cases where others have presented prominent evidence that the towers couldn’t have demolished the way they did based on the events we were told occurred. regardless, none of us knows exactly who was behind those attacks. we just believe from our government that it was the muslims. and we go about our daily lives, assuming we know all about these people, assuming everyone who follows allah is a terrorist, assuming that allowing an islamic mosque to be built close to the site of an “islamic attack” is a horrible thing to do to americans.

but what if we look at it another way? something americans have a problem doing, apparently.

whether or not islam played a part in 9/11 is something i’m not going to continue speculating on. but either way, muslims are aware of the stigma they’ve been given by americans. which is ironic, because islam is a huge religion in our country, followed by about 21% of the people here. it’s very clear, after reading (mainly conservative) posts online and even just hearing peoples’ opinions on the matter, that america is generally afraid of terrorist attacks, and are especially convinced that they’ll be carried out by people of muslim descent. and in an effort to reduce or potentially reverse this stigma, i believe the muslims want to build the mosque close to the twin towers so they can show us that we don’t have to fear them or think badly of their religion, the same way we shouldn’t generalize any other religions or cultures. this is the best way to bridge the gap between our cultures, and teach americans that we can start fresh together as opposed to divided, and we’re rejecting the notion. granted, the mosque will be built regardless of americans’ feelings on the matter, but can you imagine the outrage during its construction? the almost inevitable graffiti? i wouldn’t be surprised if it was burned to the ground. and i’m just wondering: how is this making progress? how is this helping to create a world where our children and grandchildren and generations even further down can live in peace and harmony with their neighbors? where terrorism might still be a threat but it doesn’t have to have a face or a stereotype? where people can give each other chances? the longer we wait to accept this into our society, the longer racism and stereotypes will prevail.

the fact that we perpetuate these negative feelings infects our minds, hearts, and societies. what is the harm in building an islamic mosque? is it that americans assume it’s the muslims’ way of placing a mocking stamp of their achievement? that’s not how i’m looking at it. in fact, maybe muslims just chose NY because it’s a thriving universe all on its own, full of diversity and culture. maybe they don’t want to bridge the gap, as i suggested above. that’s just my brain striving for utopia, as usual.

but i hope that the end result is that people, albeit grudgingly, accept the islamic mosque and maybe try to understand its founding principles. maybe attend some of its services. maybe learn about the culture instead of blindly shunning it.

mmm. nothing hits the spot quite like a big juicy burger, right? well, unless you’re a vegetarian, in which case you should probably just skip the rest of this paragraph, and sorry for any damage already caused. anyway, burgers are meant to be EATEN, not WORN. and by “worn,” i mean the scent. yes, as you may have already heard, there is actually a burger king-inspired perfume on the market. why? i can’t even begin to speculate. i just can’t picture the CEO of burger king visiting one of his 85,000 branches and thinking to himself, “ya know what? that flame-broiled meat would smell delectable on human skin.” where does one even think of such an atrocity? and even worse, imagine if someone sitting next to you on the bus was actually wearing it. especially if you were really hungry. or nauseous. it would be unbearable. what if you were walking your dog and someone had lathered himself in this “fragrance” before leaving the house? if your dog attacked and started biting his flesh, would you be held responsible?

and don’t worry, vegetarians, there’s one for you, too, and it has nothing to do with food at all. well, maybe food that’s been sitting in a wet towel for too long. mildew. yes, you read that right. MILDEW. damn, demeter, you’re really picking some winners. what was wrong with “spring rose” or “sea island cotton”? they might be generic but did ya have to go THAT far outside the box? i have to believe it’s some kind of joke, because anyone that would purposefully buy mildew-scented perfume is an idiot. there are only a few very specific reasons one would buy this perfume: 1. your spouse is forcing you to sell the house so you can move into a treehouse by the river, so you spray the corners with mildew and scare away all the potential buyers at the open house; 2. THAT’S THE ONLY POSSIBLE REASON YOU SHOULD EVER PURCHASE THIS WITHOUT BEING ARRESTED.

we can also buy “cannabis flower” — that’s one you should douse yourself with before heading to the airport or when your parole officer is due for a visit.

yes, you certainly ARE looking at blue cheese perfume right now.

but the grossest, nastiest, foulest, most disgusting scent ever (shudder): bodily fluids. excuse me while i gag. in fact, they might encourage people to gag into the bottle to capture this scent. they are literally advertising it as smelling reminiscent of blood, sweat, spit, etc. yes, etc. read the description yourself if you want to truly vomit.

and here i am thinking celebrities are annoying for all having their own perfumes. maybe they’re not so bad, considering what ELSE is out there.

so let me start out by saying that i’m not complaining about my job here (i don’t want to get fired). i’m more or less about to discuss the entire nature of corporate america, and why it kind of stinks. alright, really stinks. the whole concept of 9–5 is like a distant, hazy memory. i can’t remember the last time at least one of my coworkers wasn’t here until at least 8 pm. now let’s think about it. why would an employee, as loyal as he or she may be, want to be at work until that late at night? what about the new dinner recipe she wanted to cook for the family? what about the happy hour he wanted to attend with some old college friends? what about the plans and social lives and responsibilities we have outside of work? did people forget we have those? or do we neglect them in order to respond to company needs? i feel like it’s the latter, and that scares me a little bit.

i mean, the further we go down this path, the more it will be expected of us. that’s a given. in fact, it’s already expected and incorporated into many client-related industries. why not set a different standard? a different work environment? and don’t get me wrong; i’m not saying that if an employee slacks off or is incompetent and doesn’t finish an assignment by a specified time, that he or she should be given a free pass. we do still need to be good at our jobs; i mean, we are getting paid to be there, after all. but if a client drops a project on us last minute, or demands something unreasonable that will require employees to spend half the night working on it to meet their demands, shouldn’t we say no? and when i say “we,” i mean WE. all of us. all companies that service clients. we should stick to our guns. this plan doesn’t work if another company is willing to work those midnight hours, which is why it has to be universally adopted. if a client fails to meet THEIR deadlines, it shouldn’t become our problem. as the old saying goes, “poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.” what’s the point of a really good message like that if we’re not abiding by it? they even have it written on cool-looking signs. we should all have to place one within direct eyesight so we can remind ourselves of it all day at work.

and again, i know that many people don’t have a choice. we go to work and do what we’re expected to do, and if that requires staying late or working on saturdays, we do it because we need our jobs. we can’t just say no, even though many late workers would probably love to do just that. there are the scattered people who don’t mind (and maybe even enjoy) doing work outside the office; maybe it’s a challenge? maybe it keeps them busy? who knows? i just think that the majority of people would like to have their nights and weekends free for their personal lives. the things they work FOR. the reason they need money in the first place. to pay a mortgage. to put food on the table. to buy the new toy for the child. to put gas in the car to visit family. to go on vacation to get away from the annoying neighbors. stuff like that.

i don’t want us to become a society where we all demand too much of each other. life is way too short to waste it working. we need to remember there are other things that deserve equal (if not more) attention. i want everyone to picture themselves in the future, looking back at what they’re doing right now. will you be happy with your choices? will you regret staying at work so late so many nights? will you wish you could go back and change it?

well, you can. you can change it right now. do what makes you happy. if you’re not happy and don’t know what would make you happy, find it. go out there and find what it is, and then DO IT. that’s all there is to it. how can we do anything different? we’d only be cheating ourselves.

i love reading something that inspires me to write a blog post. this just happened.

this article has made me rethink a lot of the notions i had about my future. the big house with half-siding, half-stone front. basement with pool table, wet bar, and huge flat-screen TV. inground pool. hardwood floors. you know the drill. basically, lots of really expensive stuff that would make my monthly payments (yes, i’d finance everything) ridiculously high. and i’d wake up in the morning and smile when my feet hit the cool wood finish of my bamboo bedroom floor. i’d languish in the deliciously warm sun in the float in my crystal-clear blue pool. i’d entertain friends every weekend with music and cocktails. and i’d probably really enjoy my life. but i’d never be able to leave my awesome house, and eventually, i’d probably get accustomed to my favorite possessions and then, inevitably, want to replace them with better models or perhaps even buy yet another item for the living room. it would essentially be an endless cycle of buy, adapt, buy more. and at the end of my life, i’d be able to say i owned many of the things i’ve always wanted, but…did i really DO anything? if relaxing fireside with a novel is all i want to do with my life? well, for some, this might be paradise. but for me…i want more than that. and therefore, the bamboo floors might not make the cut for my future house.

i already own a house. well, a townhouse. so it’s pretty small and not detached from my neighbors. i’m always driving around, glancing longingly at the mansions i see and picturing myself on the bedroom balcony of one of them someday. but then i read the article about the couple who not only survive but are HAPPY living in a 400 square foot house, and it makes me question if my lofty goals maybe aren’t slightly misplaced. if i have a big mortgage and lots of payments, how can i travel? how can i experience life? won’t i get bored of doing the same thing week after week, year after year? won’t i want to explore the world and bring home some long-lasting memories, rather than sit on an expensive couch that eventually the dog will throw up on and require me to purchase a new, better one?

maybe i should sell my house in a couple years and move to an equally sized house, somewhere south and warm, so it would be even cheaper. and i can use the money i’m saving to do things i’ve thought about but couldn’t really afford: baking classes, dancing classes, traveling, etc. there are so many things that we’d like to do but can’t because of our other obligations and financial responsibilities. but when you think about it, if you cut down on all the things you really don’t need (i.e. the most expensive car in the lot, etc.) then you’d have a lot of money left over to DO those things. it’s up to each person, as i’m fond of repeating.

each individual should be the only judge of whether or not he or she was successful in life. success is relative to whatever goals you set for yourself, and no one’s goals are any better than the next guy’s.